*rub rub eyes* LOLS! my eyes is so itchy now=D Hmm~~ finally im 16!! Ask me how i spend my day?? Hmm~ most of the time crying LOLS. Im serious!!=D hmm~ maybe cause i tot of myself as someone more important.. but sad to say, im just so insignificant. LOLS. How should i put it.. oh.. quanyin and mandy didnt greet me for my birthday. Impact hahahas!! Yes im going to receieve belated birthday present from lumch =( haix. Makes me feel so retarded. That time even poh jia min's birthday they got her ballons and all =P not jealous. just upset. Its not fair cause most of my friends are from outside school which are guys. Guys buying present is @.@ and somemore im not even their gf LOLS. Anyways, just feel damn sad =( Cant believe khoon also forgot abt time 12:02. hahahas. More sad hahahas=P but nvm la =D He is not the first one that forget le. So hahahas....Went to khoon's house after that. Nothing to do other than audi and sleep. So i sleep lo... sleep at the way till 4. Realise that nobody is actually going to celebrate with me, decide to celebrate for myself as usual! Its really no big deal to celebrate birthday myself!! LOLS. Nobody has the heart to do it for me, so do it myself!! Wont die from it... Though said that... its just disappointing... thought this year with khoon would be different, on second thought, laogong isnt someone that celebrates, so nobody to blame!! Just like previous years, i would hang out alone to entertain myself and be happy. But this year.. for some reason, just cant cheer up?? LOLS! Maybe im too greedy and was expecting much more from friends. Who knows? I dont deserve it lo..Every year ive been telling myself not to be the same next year, convincing myself that sooner or later, my birthday, i will someone that would bring me out to have fun. Too bad!! This year is over and im still clinging on to this wish=D I tot i would do wat i did, went to plaza sing, intend to play basketball in arcade, saw H. So might as well forget it. Dont want him to see him in my red eye. LOLS later spread in the whole school i damn malu. Headline news:" Jiahuan has no friends to celebrate birthday for her--How pathetic!!" So i went off. Maybe i should get myself a chocolate instead of a cake which everytime i sing my birthday song i would light up with, cause everytime i dont eat abit waste. LOLS. But i cant find my crunchie, so got annoyed and went to take bus home. Laogong sorry, made u feel irritated=( Cause i just cant bring myself to spit out the words :" I feel so weak. u didnt bring me out to have fun today. Such a bad feeling!" On the bus, i saw laogong's concern. The exact same expression as alvin he revealed to me. Dont-know-wat-to-do-to-stop-me-from-crying-face. LOLS. In the end still make laogong cry. Hahahas. Dont need to celebrate le la. Not important anymore. Its the heart that matters. And.. once said, the meaning would be different... anyways, just got really really depressed. Hmm..how many presents do i have today?? None. Hahahas!! =P i realised i mind. I mean.. even if its a card, thats a thought. Even if its something recycled,even if its a ten cent sweet, even if its a peice of paper with wordings, its appreciated. At least i would know im not forgotten...

I wonder why this is always happening lols. Am i not good enough a friend to deserve that greeting from you? Isnt my concerns over every person spilling out. I cant care for every single one equally.. i will be empty soon... Am i not good to them?? I wonder.. LOL. OR AM I JUST TOO PARTICULAR ABT BDAY?? ITS JUST A NORMAL DAY.SHOULDNT HAVE FREAKED ME OUT LIKE THAT!! =( I really don know. I only know im in agony everytime i think of how i am treated by those i gave my care and concerns for. Life isnt fair. I know its rude to demand for anything because giving others love doesnt ask for any repay, but i just dont know why i feel so angry for that moment. Look!! its been 16 years and it just proved that i lived my life as a failure for so long...You know.. 'the same girl that bring smile to everyone's face, could very possibly be the girl that crys to herself every silent night...I hate myself!!!=( Got tired of reflecting and asking myself why. Forget it.. Today is just so.. disappointing.

Labels: Laopo's journal

Paint the hearts with love that will not fade away=)
5:25 AM

LAOPO SORRY ABOUT SATURDAY!!<3333 i love u alot alot and i will not make u angry or sad anymore, i will treat u better and even better because u r the best thing i have ever had in my life and meeting u is like miracle!!!! being with u is even more miracle then miracle! thats y i adore u n love u so much!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY LAOPO!!<333 ^^

Paint the hearts with love that will not fade away=)
9:06 AM

Its 40 mins to birthday!! Soon i will be 16=D I always enjoyed my birthday becos its on such a special date that i wont have school. If it is not on weekends, we will have teachers day celebration. Too bad its ending next year-.- In any case, im making birthday resolution!!:D

1)Good grades for o level
2)More self-discipline and reliance
3)More matured
4)Attend more gigs and performance
5)Be neat and tidy
6)Schedule out a plan and make sure i follow it
7)Spare my time wisely
8)Get to go to orphanage
9)Surprises
Last but not least, rather, most importantly:
Enjoy my very millisecond with laogong always!

Speaking of which, friday kena pangseh by stupid leonard. I keep hearing ppl say: "Hey joy! lets celebrate ur birthday tgt!!" but wat happens in the end is " Im so sorry! I will compensate u!! There is something urgent/emergency that i need to settle today.. cant celebrate."
I mean... WTH?? Its not like i will blame anyone if u dont want to celebrate. I dont really give a damn abt birthday. Birthday to me is just a acknowlegdment towards my year's acheivement and growing up. So whether i receive presents or not is not important also. And sincerity counts!!
Anyway, i feel so sorry towards laogong of being not staying at his house. Reasons are undeniable stupid and i dont feel like explaining. If understand then good, If not sua LOLS. ALthough there is a change in plan, we went to diana jie jie's hotel to stay for the night. So in fact we actually spent the night tgt as planned=D * just that we are not alone* But i enjoyed hahas.
Went for bowling in sat afternoon with my family. Thanks to milly jie jie to sponser us=D She is really nice. But something make me sick again. Khoon's sister did not come as promise. LOLS. Imagine a punch in the stomach. Thats how it feels like. But who cares. Im not really upset but just sian diao. I will not be upset because im not regarded impt to his sister mah=D And the imptance of her to me is seriously low, So i dont see the reason to get upset with. Just that i dont like my plan to be disrupted.Really hated it. In the end milly jie jie bought us to have steamboat as i suggested. Thats really nice of her=D But after that i got really really disappointed due to some matters and with laogong of cos. No mood. Seriously got so annoyed!! =( SO angry that i dont feel like talking to laogong for the moment!!=( Thinking back im still bothered abt it.
Today xiao mei didnt come. LOLS. She didnt promise to, so i wasnt mad at her. Waited for vivian till my food harden but it was quite fun. At least she came=D Fell asleep at laogong's house today. Was damn rude with my words today. Keep calling ppl 'oi'. Dont know wats wrong with me. Haix. Hope my mood gets better soon. Been playing with horny=D he is co cute^^v Thats all for today. Ops! 15 more mins to birthday. One year had pass again. How fast!!=) Happy birthday to me...

ps: laogong!! Im sorry my attitude is really bad since that thing happen!=( And if u didnt notice the slight change in atmosphere...u know wat caused it=( But i really love u alot and alot. Even More everyday!!

Labels: Laopo's journal

Paint the hearts with love that will not fade away=)
8:21 AM

laogong here!!haha im using my laopo comp to post^^ at her hse now!! it so lateeeeeee and its ghost's month , im so scare.....!!! haha but i nv do kui xin shi so nvm ^^ i hope this month faster end so my laopo wont yi shen yi gui!! i love laopo!! ^^ muack thats it for today post!!

Labels: Laogong's shout

Paint the hearts with love that will not fade away=)
7:29 AM

Hoho!! Its me again! Well~ laogong is just next to me now. We are playing audi lols. Its windows mode and its super good to use. Best still, my char did not lag!!=D Super happy hahahas. Laogong is looking at the comp now and wonder why i can just type without the need to think of wat to say. LOLS. And yes hmm~ weekends are as usual, meet laogong for breakfast, enjoyed our time tgt=D Oh!! Ive got myself a need phone. Actually me wanted ice cream phone but M1 doesnt provide this model and i was kinda sad. In the end i got myself w508 walkman phone from my fav model sony ericson=D Been playing with it and good thing it is still a flip phone. If its slide phone i will get damn sad LOLS. Now i have unlimited sms so i started spamming lumch lols. Hahahas=D yes ive been in contact with my sora er zi and nu er recently hahahas. Wat else to say hmm... looks like i have some photos to post here!

Labels: Laopo's scream

Paint the hearts with love that will not fade away=)
7:10 AM

HOHO its Been long seen i post, sry laopo for neglecting this blog but this POSTS shows tt im still reading it XD hope tt u r happy seeing me posting. OKAY actually have nothing much to say! studied the whole day and finally wanted to meet laopo at night cause i miss her badly but kena rejected by her so stay at home n slack!! LAOPO I LOVE U ALOT and please dun get wei nan HOHO cause laogong will get over it soon<3 Today my laopo got her new phone, its not ice cream phone but she seems to like it so well, at least didnt pick something tt she didnt like cause she gonna use it for the whole one year WAHAHAH but if really my laopo dun like tt phone i will get her a new one OBVIOUSLY =P okay tts its for today i want msn my laopo LE. BYE!!! ^^LOVE MY JOY NOW N EVER!!

Paint the hearts with love that will not fade away=)
6:27 AM

LOLS. Today is rather a tired day for me=D laogong came to find me again. Hahahas. I miss him so much in fact! Well~ we had lunch together. There is no remedial for me today so i intend to give laogong a surprise to appear before him in mac! Too bad we are too fated so we met each other on the way LOLS. I regard that as fate! =D well... so sad i got 11/12 and 10/ 12 for my oral reading and picture! i should get full marks!! argh. Bad voice! laogong came my house to sleep=D while im reading comic. Hahahas. He sleep so soundly! SOOOOOOO ADORABLE!! He went home for dinner with his family. AT home, decided to buy ice cream phone!!=D Happy* and 28th im celebrating bday with starhub friends! So many good things! Im tired now! thats all for today! Love laogong!

Labels: Laopo's scream

Paint the hearts with love that will not fade away=)
6:55 AM

Hoho!! Im so happy today=D had quite a few things to mention~ Lets start with happy things=D Hmm~ after school went to look for my laogong<3 I made him wait cause of nv er YY >< Im so sorry!! =( Cause nv er wasnt in a good mood and mandy is so late... i feel that i should accompany her. Although its veru unfair to make my laogong wait!! Er.. went to laogong house to slp! Yes again. Hahahas=D Before that was at tiong buying my fav veg from KFC =) saw the lady which refuses to give me my large coleslaw-.- Well, i bought it anyway. Was so glad that laogong is enjoying himself reading the comic i introduced and i think he got the same illness i had? Laugh while reading like some inane person. LOLS O consider myself rather lucky when something happen=D Or maybe i just have the ability to act accordingly apprehensively. ^^Had a really fun time with laogong while waiting for the bus. LOL. We let a few buses slip by because we just couldnt part!
Now is the thing which happen in school. Nv er is feeling sad cause her blog was read and the bastard is just playing with her feelings of admiration.
Somethings i would wanna say is... I think relationship belongs to 2 person and thus should not have any interference of a 3rd person. With regardless of who the person is, whther or not a family member or wat. I mean.. everyone has different ways to handle relationships. Grandpa and grandma may be very 'bao shou' but they are happy.( I think?I dont know) Mummy and daddy may handle relationships in a different way like keeping it traditional. Who knows my future kids and the generation may have sex the first day they met? So wat i am trying to say is... love can have rules. But not limitations. especially not by other people. Definately not my mum.^^V

Labels: Laopo's scream

Paint the hearts with love that will not fade away=)
7:42 AM

Hoho!! Went to laogong's house today=D Well in fact i slept alot hahahas! Talk abt ytd night. went to download audition's private server. Was pretty cool although it took me long and was rather annoyed. Nevertheless, laogong accompanied me till i've got everything done in the com=D "Thanks Laogong!" Im intending to contact the romaudition Game moderater to let me work as side job Game master . Well, just trying only. If cannot then nvm also=D hahahas. Back to what happen to laogong and me today=D Tons of sweet talks!! And lovey-dovey as usual!! Waa dont feel like retyping wat ive wrote but anyway just a quick update on horny. He is doing well and sleeping soundly in his cage. Nights laogong!

Labels: Laopo's scream

Paint the hearts with love that will not fade away=)
10:31 AM

Today i spent MY DAY with my LAOPO, JOY!!! Im so happy CAUSE I MISS HER BADLY and we are going to see one another. SHE WAS SO CUTE!!! I LOVE HER LOTS<33333333333. I enjoyed my day i hope my LAOPO enjoy it TOO !! And was quite STUN because of somethingxD!!! HOHO, Not going to tell u all why=P i was like ermmmm^^ but i FEEL SO LOVED!!! MAN IM SO XING FU!! ^^ thats all for today!

PS:- LAOPO U R MY ONE N ONLY, MUACK!!!

Paint the hearts with love that will not fade away=)
9:14 AM

Argh! Today i am super moody~ LOLS. let me start with the happy things first=D
1) Was playing alot in class... and i've got a present from my angel--- Erchin kor kor. Well~ he is my kor kor since sec 3 i think?=D Been treating me nice as well as the first person i had a crush on. LOLS. Well. I think its fate+ coincidence that we played angel and mortal game as a class, out of 40 ppl i got his and he got mine. So i am his angel and mortal, he is my angel and mortal too! LOLS enough of these=D im so happy cause its been a long time since i received a present=D
Now the listing of sad stuffs:
1) Laogong is moody all day because we are unable to play during the weekends for this week. But I dont really mindxD cause we are still tgt. Just becos somethings poped up doenst means i wont be having fun isnt it? So Laogong>>>" Dont be moody! I love u!! *hug*"
2) Met alot of noob hackers in audition today. Mad me upset. Yes i got a whole list of people who hacked and including friends ive known for a long time wanting to win me and use this kind of methods.
3) Didnt really get to play much with horny as he is always sleeping? Even though he looked as cute when he is sleeping but im still wana play with him. I sand bathed him again and he kept running away!!

I think tats all for my complain for today. I cant wait to meet laogong tmr!!=D I cant believe im sweating at home now-.- Wat the hell.... Its okay! laogong i miss u >.<

Labels: Laopo's scream

Paint the hearts with love that will not fade away=)
9:51 AM

Tomorrow Is national day celebration, my laopo only got half day of school, IM SO HAPPY!!! This means that me n my laopo got more time to spend BUT becos OF MY STUPID UNCLE dun know how to take care of himself n his leg rot need go surgery, and i need to help my mum to work during weekends, that means i CANT PEI MY LAOPO =( dam sad n dam angry, 60 plus years old still dun know how to take care of himself, he can LONG PIAK(BANG WALL) -.- I WANT PEI MY LAOPO , SIAN !! BUT AT LEAST STILL GOT FRIDAY , >.< Sigh! I Feel so MOODY NOW! LAOPO =( I LOVE U !!! HoRnY , I MISS U TOO <3 =(

Paint the hearts with love that will not fade away=)
2:34 AM

Hoho!! Its finally my turn to write!!=D Been working on the blogskin and the blog's top to bottom done by me xD << Yes im stealing credit and showing everyone that laogong is slacking =P Well~ not to bad! At least its worth while after i saw wat laogong wrote=D Yes its been a month now! It just reminds me of how time flies! For the convenience of all, i shall not be so mushy here but u will not know wat happen behind closed doors *laughs* xD I didnt go to school today~ This means im only attending 2/7 this week since monday is thanks giving break and friday is celebration=D So fun!<33 How nice of erchin kor kor to ask me how am i=D STUPID LUMCH SO LATE THEN ASK! *mad* hahas! at least u called, so u are forgiven=D Did my Poa homework with laogong at home. Was guilty for being bad but im gonna remain this way=D Eyes are closing >.< Nights muacks laogong and muacks h0rny!<33

Ps: Sorry laogong!!>< U know i hate my family =( My bad attitude but feel free to punish me! Im urs=D

Labels: Laopo's scream

Paint the hearts with love that will not fade away=)
8:41 AM

Laopo<33333 The one and only I love , we have been together since 1 July,2009 ^^ During these days we almost meet out everyday, i cant stop myself from meeting her!! i missed her more than anyONE can imagine! AND i always find a REASON to find her =) seeing her makes me feel so comfortable i dun wish to leave her for even a split second. but its IMPOSSIBLE hoho!^^ SO MY ONLY WISH is TO MARRY her AND she WILL BE MINE!! GUYS PLS PLS DUN hate me from snatching away MY LAOPO JOY<3!! I will make sure she will be well taken care of<3 pls Be jealous!!!LOLX A reverse phychology way to make u all think why should i be jealous, HOHO! OH LAST BUT NOT LEAST our PET h0RNY !! I LOVE U TOO<3 MUACK! ^^

Labels: Laogong's shout

Paint the hearts with love that will not fade away=)
8:24 AM